Greatest College Entrance Essay

While on vacation in Canada, I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery.

I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid.

The glow from the laptop reflects off his forehead as he stares at the screen, paralyzed by panicked perfectionism.

The Common Application essay prompts are neatly copied onto the blank document, taunting him with possibility.

His young mind races from topic to topic, each of which he dismisses immediately. His meaningful relationship with his deceased grandfather…overdone.

The first time he received a grade below an “A” on an English paper...trite.I once read Paradise Lost, Moby Dick, and David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening.I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket.Reading the college essay topics for what seems to be the hundredth time, he searches in vain for an event, challenge, accomplishment, obstacle, interest or talent about which to write.For a fleeting moment, he laments the absence of a personal tragedy to exploit while he sits with the cursor flashing—a pulsating symbol of perplexity.   Especially tormented are the perfectionists, you dutiful students who view the college essay as just one more roadblock to be overcome with sheer will.Circulating via email and social media, this has to be the funniest, most outrageous "college application essay" ever written. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. Was it written for the purpose of applying for college? I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice.I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie. I have been caller number nine and have won the weekend passes.Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of corduroy evening wear. Last summer I toured New Jersey with a traveling centrifugal-force demonstration. My deft floral arrangements have earned me fame in international botany circles. I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy.I have made extraordinary four course meals using only a mouli and a toaster oven. I have won bullfights in San Juan, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and spelling bees at the Kremlin.This satirical essay — or a version of it — was written in 1990 by high school student Hugh Gallagher, who entered it in the humor category of the Scholastic Writing Awards and won first prize.

SHOW COMMENTS

Comments Greatest College Entrance Essay

  • Best Samples for the Best College Admission Essays
    Reply

    An Essay Worth Sharing When an experienced admissions counselor asks your permission to share your essay with 20 other schools, you know it’s a winner. 8. Ten-pack of Brilliant Essays. Scan down the list of ten great opening lines, and when you find an essay that matches your style, click through to read it all.…

  • College Essay Examples for 14 Schools + Expert Analysis
    Reply

    Links to Full College Essay Examples. Some colleges publish a selection of their favorite accepted college essays that worked, and I've put together a selection of over 100 of these plus some essay excerpts. Common App Essay Samples. Please note that some of these college essay examples may be responding to prompts that are no longer in use.…

  • The Funniest College Application Essay Ever Written
    Reply

    This is an actual essay written by a college applicant to NYU in response to this question 3A. IN ORDER FOR THE ADMISSIONS STAFF OF OUR COLLEGE TO GET TO KNOW YOU, THE APPLICANT, BETTER, WE ASK THAT YOU ANSWER THE FOLLOWING QUESTION ARE THERE ANY SIGNIFICANT EXPERIENCES YOU HAVE HAD, OR ACCOMPLISHMENTS YOU HAVE REALIZED, THAT HAVE HELPED TO DEFINE YOU AS A PERSON?…

  • College Admission Essay Samples - Essay Writing Center
    Reply

    College Essay Three. The winter of my seventh grade year, my alcoholic mother entered a psychiatric unit for an attempted suicide. Mom survived, but I would never forget visiting her at the ward or the complete confusion I felt about her attempt to end her life.…

  • Twelve College Essay Examples That Worked 2019
    Reply

    One of the best ways to write an awesome essay for your college application or admissions personal essay is by learning from real college essay samples that worked. So I've compiled some great college essay examples from a variety of student experiences as well as tons of supplemental essay and personal statement topics, like the UChicago short answer questions, the "Why This College" essay.…

  • Tips for Writing a Winning College Application Essay
    Reply

    While it's important to be thoughtful and mature, you don't want your college application essay to be too heavy. Try to lighten up the essay with a clever metaphor, a well-placed witticism, or a little self-deprecating humor. But don't overdo it. The essay that is filled with bad puns or off-color jokes will often end up in the rejection pile.…

  • The greatest college application essay ever - Blake Snow
    Reply

    The greatest college application essay ever. Here’s an oldie but goodie. Hugh Gallagher won first prize in the humor category of the 1990 Scholastic Writing Awards for the following essay. He allegedly used it to get into NYU and graduated from the university in 1994.…

  • The Best College Admissions Essays I Have Ever Read
    Reply

    This student goes to Hamilton College, studies science, and wrote easily one of the most dry and wry college essays I have ever read. Perhaps he is British. Perhaps he is British. The premise of this essay, which we have listed in its entirety on the Essays page of CollegeMapper, is that this science guy goes to the museum and is handed a.…

  • Famous College Essay Ivy Coach Admissions Blog
    Reply

    This is the most famous college essay that comes to mind for us in our many years in the business of highly selective college admissions. Ivy Coach" - The Dartmouth.…

  • College Essays - Top 147 Essays That Worked - Study Notes
    Reply

    Top 147 Successful College Essays. Get into the college of your dreams! We hope these essays inspire you as you write your own personal statement. Just remember to be original and creative as you share your story.…

The Latest from granarts.ru ©