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Or, they insist that others treat them considerately or fairly, and they create feelings of severe anger or hostility when others do not.Or, they dictate that life and the world be easy, enjoyable and unfrustrating, and they manufacture over rebelliousness, self- pity and inertia when conditions are difficult.For, to hold that anything is awful, terrible, or horrible, rather than unfortunate, unpleasant, or painful, is to hold: (1) It is all bad and can have no good in it; (2) It is more than bad or disadvantageous; (3) Because it is unpleasant, it should not and muse not exist; (4) One cannot stand its existence; (5) One has to be utterly miserable about it; and (6) One is a worthless person if he cannot immediately change himself, others, and the universe so that this awful thing no longer exists.
Unfortunately, these values may also have created a life that is carrying you down a path that is not the direction you want to go at this point in your life. What values are you presently living in accordance with? Yet, finding the answers to these questions is a challenge and then changing them in a way that will lead to fulfillment is an even greater challenge.
Deconstructing Your Values To truly understand what values you possess and live by, you must deconstruct them until you are able to clearly see what exactly you value and why you hold those values.
They essentially represent demons which one invents and is governed by.
And, once one devoutly believes in them, these will create anxiety, guilt feelings of worthlessness, depression, and hostility.
If one rigidly holds these ideas about anything, he will be basically upsettable and often disturbed.
If one wants to eliminate one’s disturbance, he can substitute two other simple words: “Tough luck”, “Too bad”, or “How unfortunate”.
Your values will influence your decisions related to your relationships, career, and other activities you engage in.
Despite this importance, few people choose their values.
People, who feel anxious, depressed or hostile do not merely wish to prefer something but also command, dictate, insist that they achieve this thing.
Typically, they demand that they be outstandingly achieving and/or greatly approved by others, and they thereby make themselves disturbed when they fail to achieve these demands.